NOT CLICK BAIT... my mom had an affair with my bestfriends boyfriend and got pregnant. part 2

Malcolm and I had a kinda rough start in galway we adjusted to the move but I really resented him for not telling me about my mom and Nikki and their affair.
we argued a lot but then the arguments turned to him hitting me, I don't remember when it 1st started but after about 4months I was feeling really sick and very tired all the time was vomiting after eating anything I went to the hospital and well yeah I was 3 months pregnant, OHH NOOO cauz I never wanted kids naa ahh not me anyway the abuse continued through the pregnancy but as I was pregnant and I didn't want to be alone I suffered through, we moved back to Donegal and I said I wasn't gonna have the kid and keep it so adoption was what we decided.
we had an adoption agency come meet us a few times everything was set, then at 7 and half months she was born, I refused to see her cause I knew she was going to the adoptive family.
But hahah!  yeah joke on me Malcolm had his sisters and mom basically BULLY me into keeping her, we did we called her Chanel, the beatings continued cause I did NOT want or was NOT ready to be a parent and he used to get mad at me for not getting involved but I had told him so many times I WILL NOT BE INVOLVED IF YOU WANT TO KEEP HER ITS ON YOU...
I was suffering from post natal depression I didn't know that at the time though

I had during that time found my mom well my dad hired a pi and found her living on the isle of man and she was a private nurse for an old lady and dating her son, my now stepdad Dave.
we   went to visit and even there Malcolm beat me up and ohh yeah my own mom told me it was my fault for being rude to him and not pulling my weight with the baby, but how many times I made it clear I DIDNT WANT A KID... I was looking for some writing paper and all of a sudden I found a pink bit of paper saying NUGENT CARE ADOPTION SOCIETY dated 6months before chanel was born and the name on it was Bernadette B**** my mom so I read it I was floored so I went looking for the rest of the info and called them up they wouldn't tell me anything except if you write letters they will be passed on when she is 18, proof enough I HAD A SISTER, born to Nikki the man my mom left my dad for and she gave the kid up for adoption cause she didn't wanna stay with nikki on the iom, huh!!  my mom the hyprocrite

Anyway we moved to Galway when we came back to Ireland and the abuse got worse, so bad the neighbours upstairs came to help a few times when they heard me screaming
I had enough 1 day when he pulled a knife on me so I went to the  shp[s bought packets of pills some asprin and untold bottles of larger and took 36 pills with untold drinks and ran a bath I wanted to die.
he broke down the bathroom door got me to hospital and I had my stomach pumped I was told I could have kidney failure or other damage so I was kept in for obs the next day at home I was so sore from the stomach pumping and was vomiting all day he still beat me so bad I then had enough I left the next day.

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